Sheep Dream of Electric Memes

Eeeeewwww, I stepped in a meme!

Thanks to Cranky Professor (and someone else who tagged me so long ago I’ve forgotten who it was), I will now share six previously unknown and random facts about myself that I haven’t already shared here, here, here, here, here, or here.

1) The rules for this meme are:
2) Link to the person that tagged you.
3) Post the rules on your blog.
4) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
5) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
6) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.

1- I broke my coccyx on the job once. I tried to convince the boss it was worthy of a Worker’s Comp claim, but he insisted that a grown man had no business jumping on his kid’s trampoline, especially since the man in question was supposed to be replacing the alternator on an ambulance at the time. Trying to explain that I was doing practical research on the kinematics of trauma also fell on deaf ears. He did get me a nice foam donut to sit on, though.

Don’t smirk. I wasn’t the only paramedic jumping on the trampoline that day.

2 – Back in my high school days, Louisiana State Police cruisers used to bear the sticker Tourist Information on their trunk lids. Here’s a tip from your Uncle Ambulance Driver, kiddies: Never flag down a state trooper and ask, “Hey, where can a guy go to get laid in this town?”

They’re not apt to find it as funny as you did.

3. I once had a Labrador retriever bitch that mated in the missionary position. Seriously. She was a field trial dog that we retired after a training injury had her hips rather atrophied and weak. When we bred her, the stud weighed twice as much as she did. In his, uh…enthusiasm…he knocked her over, and she rolled over on her back, and…bingo!

I think it was just a combination of luck, Jazz’s weak hips and Kisatchie’s enthusiasm, but my brother has looked at me strangely ever since. Hasn’t asked me to pet-sit either.

4. I am a dog snob. With the exception of the Pekingese Babs bought my daughter, I have never owned a dog I paid less than $500 for, even back in the days when such prices were exceptionally high. Nowadays, the puppies whose bloodlines I fancy run at six times that.

Probably explains why I’ve been dogless for six years.

5. I absolutely cannot drink tequila. No matter how good it is, no matter how much you paid for the bottle, no matter how aged it is, there is something about tequila that hits the REVERSE button on my peristalsis. What goes down, comes back up, and right then. When all the boys are whooping it up doing tequila shooters, I’m the lonely outcast at the corner of the bar, drinking beer and playing that stupid trivia machine.

6. I have a recurrent nightmare in which I wake up to discover that I’m a college student again, and I missed the withdrawal date for calculus class. In my dream, I fall hopelessly behind and wind up getting an F for the semester, ruining my chances at medical school.

That’s just silly, of course.

Of the four times I’ve taken calculus, not once have I missed such an important deadline.

Not tagging anyone. Play if you want to.