A New Disease

Fred Sanford Syndrome: clinical disorder characterized by the life-threatening complaints in the absence of any objective clinical findings. Sufferers of Fred Sanford    Syndrome (FSS) usually present with chest pain, often accompanied by a constellation of associated symptoms including respiratory distress, dizziness, anxiety, syncope, flatulence, incontinence, amnesia, seizures, speaking in tongues, headaches, blurred vision, loss of vision, aphasia, dysphasia, paranoia, combativeness, belligerence, and catatonia.

FSS is thought to be triggered by emotional distress, often resulting from verbal conflict with family members. The hallmark signs of FSS are dying declarations, although these dying declarations are easily distinguished from from the far more ominous "profound sense of impending doom" often reported by acute coronary syndrome sufferers, primarily by the volume and frequency of the declarations, and the presence of a receptive audience.

FSS is exclusively found in males, although many healthcare care providers note its similarities to Scarlett O'Hara Syndrome (SOS) found in females, and postulate that it may indeed be the same disease.

Given the frequency at which I see this disorder, I think it's time we added it to the ICD-10.

Or, given the total lack of objective clinical findings, perhaps the DSM V.

 

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