Pearls Before Swine

As I mentioned earlier, the very first EMS call Black Cloud and I ran together was a cardiac arrest.

Even worse, it was early enough in the shift that I hadn't even had time to orient her on the layout of the ALS bag, teach her the necessary ALS-assist skills, nor even deliver my standard, "You Are a Thinking EMT and Not a Pack Mule and I Expect Your To Use Your Head and Exercise Some Initiative," talk that I give to all my new partners.

So it was to be expected, I suppose, that the call wouldn't run smoothly.

Except that it did run smoothly, not that anyone noticed.

Did she appreciate the fact that, in the 24+ minutes the pads were attached to the patient, compressions were only interrupted for a grand total of 30 seconds, and never less than 6 seconds at a time, including the intubation and defibrillation?

Did she notice my skill and panache at wielding a laryngoscope as I flawlessly performed a skyhook intubation, done without interrupting chest compressions, no less?

Was she grateful that I queued up "Stayin' Alive" on repeat on my iPhone to help her keep rhythm? (Yes, I really did, and no, the family wasn't offended.)

Noooooooooo, of course not.

All she noticed was how hot it was in the room, and how difficult it was to perform chest compressions on a Real Live Patient.

*sigh*

Philistines…