Shamans and Charlatans

Scott, body builder, cancer survivor, and possessor of a mildly disturbing Klingon fetish (just kidding, Scott. No, seriously. Put down the Bat’Leth!), gives us the recipe for the typical 21st century snake oil pitch:

1 cup of charismatic speaker / product inventor
2 tablespoons of pseudo-scientific medical jargon
1/2 cup of testimonies of miraculous cures
1 dash of celebrity name drops
1 medium-sized fresh metaphysical babble, pitted

Preheat oven to 375. In a large bowl, mix charismatic speaker /product inventor with testimonies of miraculous cures. Mince the metaphysical babble and mix into bowl. Butter a small pan and spread mixture into the bottom. Drizzle the pseudo-scientific medical jargon and celebrity name drops on top. Cover pan with tin foil and bake on middle rack for 20-25 minutes.

Ah, smell that aroma?

When you pull the pan out of the oven and remove the foil, you either have an EVIL GENIUS SOUFFL’E, or a PLACEBO EFFECT POUND CAKE, depending on your particular level of stupidity.

Heh. Does it cure fibromyalgia, too?

Browse by Category