Ambulance Driver’s Aimless Tweets

  • I wanted the scariest possible costume to strike terror in my patients' hearts tonight. So I'm going as a job application. #
  • When you're on PCP and running from the cops, don't break into the house of the mixed martial artist who owns a katana. Man, that was nasty! #
  • Dear ER nurse, when your patient is TOTALLY asymptomatic, it's a safe bet his BP isn't really 50/20, despite what your machine says. #
  • Paraglyphics and EMS Pidgin: Even a mediocre medic shines like a diamond compared to the unpolished turds like .. #
  • What, They Never Heard of Scooby Snacks?: From the Culpeper, VA Star Exponent comes this piece of news:

    Five V.. #

  • The quarry has been brought to bay in a dumpster! Now my assistant Jim will wrestle him to the ground and fit him with a radio collar… #
  • Cruising an apt. complex, looking by spotlight for the naked PCPer. It's like Wild Kingdom, only with Tazers instead of a tranquilizer gun! #
  • Advantages of a redneck working with a lesbian partner: You can babe watch without guilt, and chances are you both dip the same brand. #
  • For You EMS Types…: … there’s another column about EMS 2.0 over on
    Weigh in with yo.. #
  • Monkeys flinging shit at a map: that's our dispatchers making post assignments. #
  • EMS 2.0: An Inconvenient EMS Truth: Of those three identified categories of trauma death, EMS has the potential.. #
  • Ambulance Driver’s Aimless Tweets:
    If The Crimson Shade of My Neck Didn’t Give You A Clue…: .. #
  • Come on, Saints! What's with the effin' turnovers, guys? #

Browse by Category