Observations From The Bolance

Discovered tonight on a seizure call:

1. The map tracking on our computer system does not accurately pinpoint the location of the parish juvenile detention center. However, if you follow the turn-by-turn directions from the GPS navigation program in our mobile data terminals, it will lead you directly to Chuck E. Cheese.
2. 16-year-old seizure fakers, as a general rule, aren’t very talented actors. Let’s put it this way: the kid we just transported was no Haley Joel Osment. I doubt he’d have even made it as Screech’s understudy in Saved By The Bell.