The Reviews Are In!

…and here’s what the critics had to say about last night’s seizure performance by Tameka Rashonda Shopaqualethia De’Nae Guidry (but her friends call her ‘Boo’) of Malingering Acres FEMA Trailer Park and Crack Bazaar:

Absolutely unbelievable – and not in a good way. A wooden and unconvincing performance. Two thumbs down!
– Ebert and Roeper At The Movies

A thinly drawn and poorly acted caricature of an actual seizure. I give this one one star out of four.
– Rex Reed, The New York Observer

Dull and uninspired. Tameka appears to have graduated from the Mark Walhberg School of Acting. Steven Seagal looks more animated, and this woman was supposed to be having a seizure! I actually thought she was trying to clear a wedgie.
– Michael Medved

When we think of classic seizure performances, masterpieces like the Ranger Lieutenant in the barracks scene in “Black Hawk Down” or Robert Pastorelli’s spellbinding rendition of the burnt worm in the Schwarzenegger hit “The Eraser” come to mind. Well, Tameka Guidry is no Robert Pastorelli. Don’t bother seeing this one.
– Leonard Maltin

A bravura performance! An epileptic tour de force! Tameka Rashonda Shopaqualethia De’Nae Guidry turns in a harrowing, multifaceted performance of a woman felled by tragic illness, fallen through the cracks of society, abandoned by an uncaring and discriminatory healthcare system. Just watching her gut-wrenching portrayal of a grand mal seizure brought tears to my eyes! And when Obama is elected, he’ll make sure that people like Tameka all get free healthcare, and a pink unicorn that poops sparkly marshmallow rainbows. I give this one six out of five stars!
– Libby Blustadter, The Village Voice

This is a seizure? Where’s the bloody tongue? Where’s the urinary incontinence? Where’s the postictal period? You mean she conned some clown out of a Dilantin prescription for this???
– Nurse Cynic, Big City Memorial ER

Try method acting, Boo. This performance won’t even get you a whiff of a Valium syringe.