Massaging Your ‘Possum

And no, that’s not a euphemism for masturbation.

I can see why one might think that, this being my blog and all…

I do, however, still reserve the right to use stroking the muskrat, fighting the turkey, choking the chicken, flogging the dolphin and wrestling with Pedro as my own personal code phrases for self-abuse.

Hat tip to Phlegmmy.