Kilted to Kick Cancer 2014: The Standings

Well folks, we’re seven days into the Kilted to Kick Cancer 2014 Fundraising Challenge, and we’ve already raised over $2,000. Team standings as of noon CST, September 8 are:

Team Donors Totals
Team HBC Concealment 7 578
Team Borepatch 12 570
Undesignated 6 285
Team Old NFO 6 250
Team JayG 5 195
Team McThag 4 195
Team Ambulance Driver 2 150
Team Coykendall 3 110
Team Guns & Coffee 4 55
Team Brosius 1 50
Team Jason Gardiner 1 50
Team USA Karate 1 20

Looks like a horse race for first place between Team HBC Concealment and Team Borepatch, with Team Old NFO in third!

And, um, the winners of the first three fundraising challenges (myself and Jay G.) are sucking hind tit, way down in the standings. Hey folks, I’m all for parity and spreading the wealth around, and I’m not eligible for prizes anyway, but this is just embarrassing.

I mean, seriously, seventh place? Only two donors?

FOR PETE’S SAKE, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEGIONS OF FLYING MONKEYS, AIDING ME IN MY QUEST FOR WORLD DOMINATION?

Kick in a little, please. Ten bucks, twenty bucks, doesn’t matter. Every little bit helps, it’s for a good cause, and it’s all tax deductible.

Just click on this link, click on the box that says “This donation is made as part of a Fundraising Team” and choose Team Ambulance Driver.

Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!

Even better, if you’d like to donate, but just don’t have the cash, there’s an easy way to do that, too. Let’s say you’d love to chip in a few hundred bucks, but can’t afford it this month. Fine, donate $20, and check the option for “I would like this donation to automatically repeat each month.”

That’s $240 in tax-deductible donations each calendar year, in twelve easy installments! What could be easier?

(Okay, not donating would be easier, but it wouldn’t help our cause of advancing prostate cancer research.)

And if you donate to my campaign, I’ll willingly debase myself for your amusement. I lettered in Double Dog Dare in elementary school, people. I’ll do anything short of disfigurement and public nudity.

Just. Donate.

Get Kilted, and get checked!